6/17/07

Medicating Children With Symptoms Of ADHD









When my son was in the second grade, his teacher suggested he have an evaluation for Attention Deficit Disorder.
Coping with the consequences of a divorce, our home had become an organizational disaster area, throwing my son into an emotional orbit. There were changes in his daily routine and children go haywire when their environment provides them little, or poor structure. During this time in our family my son was hyper, restless , and unhappy. Although he was voted "best character" in his school's yearbook the year before our family problems.

It got to where I could pinpoint when he would bring a disciplinary letter home from school. You can see why his teacher was concerned since she certainly didn't have a clue what was happening in our home.

Educators, child psychologists, and parents alike, often blame the child, instead of looking at what our kids may be experiencing at any given moment.

This is not to suggest we ignore teachers and child psychologists advice, or not pay close attention to our children's' behavior; however, you have to be careful, when considering putting your child on a potentially harmful medication.
Moreover, we have to watch being over zealous in our attempt to help kids who suffer from both, Attention Deficit Disorder, and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. With so many children on drugs (ADHD medication) that have a street drug value, there is certainly cause for alarm.

It seems regardless of the consequences, parents, physicians, and educators, are quick to assess, and medicate children with social and behavior problems, misdiagnosing these kids with ADD or ADHD. This raises concern over the question, that we may be overlooking better treatments, and options for kids with ADD or ADHD.

After the opposition to an evaluation, my sons' teacher insisted on the completion of a written list of symptoms, confirming his behavior. However, the questions to the evaluation were general. For example, " Is your child easily bored or distracted?" Now, how can you answer that? Especially, if you are opposed to putting your child on medication, and your answers may suggest your child has ADD or ADHD. It's easier to prescribe medication instead of looking at all the options, especially when a professional suggests it.

Why do we make it our children's problem, then define them as having something wrong with them, simply because they are higher strung than other children? When many of these kids would benefit from a highly structured environment, with daily routines. We need to stop being indolent, and start looking into the many alternatives that are producing positive results.

Alternatives to medicines are out there; although like children taking medication, these alternatives should be part of a comprehensive treatment program. Parental counseling, educational plans, and social training, are the essential ingredients to any successful treatment program, which needs to be in place with or without medication.

For example parents should research a comprehensive treatment program whether their child
is on medication or not.

So we all need to focus on the whole picture when it comes to treating and diagnosing ADHD.
You know your child better than anyone else, so listen to your own instincts, especially on an issue as important ADHD.



Note from author- This article is referring to my personal experience with my sons symptoms of ADHD. All parents should follow the advice of their medical professional when considering medicating their children. These are the opinions of a writer and parent not a medical professional derived from personal experience and shouldn't be used as a basis for making such an important and personal decision. Everyones situation and experiences are different and need to be considered on a individual basis by medical professionals.



Thank you for reading!






Photo obtained from public images


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6/6/07

When Young Children Lie For Approval




Children lie for different reasons, so it's important for parents to understand the difference between a lie and an exaggeration. Children pretend lie, exaggerate, or lie to keep from getting in trouble. Therefore, it’s helps if parents understand the intention behind, or the reason their child is lying, and get professional advice on the best course of action to take. This article is simply the opinion of another parent and a children’s book writer meant to inspire and entertain parents in the area of rearing children. However, my own childhood experiences coupled with a love for children inspired me to write about the issue of self-esteem in early childhood...

For me the first grade was a courageous attempt to conceal my inability to jump rope from the girls in my class. The youngest and only girl in my family, I learned to play games like Batman and Robin instead of learning to jump rope or master the hoola hoop. Before the first grade, I never laid eyes on a jump rope before, and now I had to learn to jump one!

I needed help, and I thought help arrived in the form of Holly White, a popular little girl in my first grade classroom. Everyone loved Holly, and everything Holly did met with instant approval.

All of the little girls in my first grade class wanted to be friends with Holly, so every Friday she would interview each of her admirers, and decide which one would have the pleasure of her company. I thought I had a real shot, however my hopes were about to disintegrate.


My parents had a boarding stable, and most children were impressed with that fact, however Holly White did not turn out to be one of those children. Holly loved pigs, not horse’s, pigs, or at least that‘s what she said. Therefore, when she was deciding which groupies house to attend, she asked each of us what was so great about our house. I told her during my interview that my house was great because we had pigs. The lie came out of my mouth before I knew it, and it was too late after it did, since Holly was delighted at the prospect of meeting the sloppy livestock, and told everyone about our plans for that week-end.

We had about fifty acres of property that we used for a pasture, so I assumed the pasture would be a good place to keep a pig farm. I conspired to walk Holly out in the pasture, and when we couldn’t find any pigs (since there weren’t any) I would say the pigs must have wandered off somewhere when we there. So you see it was not only a lie it was a premeditated lie!

When we arrived at the barn, Holly and I went out to the pasture to look for the pig farm. I thought I was on top of the world, I was not only friends with a celebrity, I had impressed her with my engaging resources. We were halfway through the pasture when we heard, “Ann! What are you doing?” echo from a distance.

Before I could return a lie for my answer Holly hollered back, “We’re going to see the pigs!”

I wanted to disappear, and then I heard my Mother answer, “Ann We don’t have any pigs! Come back from the pasture this instant!” consequently, this is where my popularity at school came to a screeching halt, and I went back to being plain old Ann, except that I added liar to my name. The fact that I felt the weight of humiliation the rest of the year was a blessing, however, I was too young to realize it at the time.

I think one of the main reasons children lie is for the same reason I did, they wish to be accepted by their peers. Especially today, with so many different forms of entertainment, and the bombardment of ads suggesting that only certain styles of clothing and physical characteristics are acceptable in society today. All of these elements have the propensity to damage young children's self -esteem. And a poor self -esteem not only robs children of an opportunity for a bright future, it is at fault for many of society’s social problems today; drug abuse, crime, domestic abuse and eating disorders all derive from a lack of, or poor self -esteem.


I think parents should provide ways of helping their kids improve their self-esteem, through positive reinforcement, positive role modeling, and communication. One of the best gifts you can give your child is to provide them with ways they can improve their self worth. If they believe in themselves they will not expect the world to provide them with happiness, rather they will expect themselves to provide happiness to the world. So nurture their self-esteem it will most certainly pay off in the future.


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6/2/07

Spanking Where Do You Draw The Line?




Where do you draw the line? Spare the rod spoil the child, is what many parents believe. According to ChildAbuse.com, 61 percent of the parents surveyed say they believe spanking is an acceptable form of discipline. Most parents who spank their children had parents who spanked them, given that spanking is an acceptable form of discipline in their family. It seems parents who themselves were spanked deny their true memory of the occasion. We learn many things from our parents that we do not utilize in our parenting, but it seems spanking is passed down from one generation to the next.

Maybe it is because we do not remember the negative feelings associated with a spanking, and trust that we must have deserved a spanking if we got one.

After all, we did turn out o.k., did we not? This is not to say, that if you spank your child or children you are a bad parent, however after what I experienced not long ago, I cannot see myself ever spanking a child again. Since my doctor’s office was closed, over the weekend I had to go the emergency room for a minor injury.

When I got there were so many people in the waiting area, I had to sit outside in the lobby.
Within a few minutes a pregnant woman, with two small children began walking back and forth to the restroom, her babies struggling to keep up with her long strides.

The woman was walking at a fast pace, more like the pace someone keeps when walking for exercise, not in the company of two small children. Her children toddled behind, the little boy keeping up better than the girl, but both were a good ways behind Mom.

The little girl was having the most trouble, although she was humming a song, and smiling at me every time they passed. Her older brother trailed closer to Mom, although I believe this was due to experience. On the last trip, the little girl's legs gave out and down she fell to the floor, followed by a wail so loud it echoed through the lobby. Some Fireman took notice and the security guard on duty put his newspaper down.

Several people including myself went toward the little girl to see how they could help. This was when the little baby suddenly threw her arms up for me to pick her up. Since I had been smiling at her when she passed, the baby thought I was there to comfort her, in spite of the fact that her Mom was right there. Then the mother grabbed her arm, yanked her around, and slapped her against the head and on the behind in front of everyone!

I will never forget the look on that little girls face while her mother disciplined her.

You could tell her heart was breaking and her feelings were hurt, as she held the look of dismay, fear, and anger in her expression. Her face turned different shades of color and the happy little baby transformed within those few minutes, from gentle and kind to angry and despondent. I could not help but wonder what she was internalizing at that moment. When she is an adult, will she remember the negative feelings associated with that spanking?

I guess this is an extreme example, however what serves as a good example for spanking? The mother at the hospital looked at me as if she had done nothing wrong, and I really think she believed it! She probably grew up in an environment where spanking in all in a days work.

When we spank our children, are we not sending confusing messages? It is confusing, we teach children not to hit their friends, or fight at school, and at the same time, we tell them that we spank them because we love them. Again, where do you draw the line?

Our children receive mixed messages everyday when it comes to violent behavior, so maybe we should be setting a better example at home.

For instance if we spank our children from babyhood on they learn to react with hostility

When confronted with negative feelings, or situations. One of my favorite poems about parent hood is Children learn what they Live, by Dorothy Law Nolte, PhD

Every time I read this poem, I understand why Dr. Nettle has a PhD in her signature.

If it is true that our children learn what they live, parents need to be mindful of how their

behavior influences their children's daily lives.

One of the hardest decisions we make as parents is deciding which form of discipline to use, and when it comes to spanking where do you draw the line?


Poem, Children Learn What They Live

Child Abuse.com

Link to Photo image- Public




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Today's Popular Children's Picture Books

Today's Popular Children's Picture Books
Click on the titles below for the link to Publishers Weekly.com

Upcoming Book Reviews with a guest post from the author, Charles Ghigna

Upcoming Book Reviews with a guest post from the author,  Charles Ghigna
My First Book Of Hockey!

Strange, Unusual, Gross, & Cool Animals

Strange, Unusual, Gross, & Cool Animals
By Charles Ghigna

Motherhood- Courage


Motherhood is an art impossible to explain, one which requires a vast sea of love, devotion, compassion, and understanding, unmatched by any affection we will ever know again.- Ann Clemmons

Courage-

Courage



Humor-

Humor


Words-

Words are the core of our souls, without written, vocal or lyrical expression we lose sight of one another or worse, ourselves. Words bring forth the essence of the human spirit; so express yourself without abandon.

Ann Clemmons

Written Phrase

Why is it that those we should know or believe turn out to be the ones we least understand? I suppose the world is an illusion until we find our way home.-Ann Clemmons

Favorite Phrase

I remember I used to half believe and wholly play with fairies when I was a child. What heaven can be more real than to retain the spirit-world of childhood, tempered and balanced by knowledge and common-sense...

Beatrix Potter’s Journal, 17 November 1896, from the National Trust collection.

Jacket Flap-

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The Storyteller, by Dawn Drover

Alone in her world
of make believe
weaving her stories
of magic and light

She brings joy
to the eyes
of innocent minds
less jaded and free

For only they know
what's in her heart
holding the secrets
she guards so well

Life's hidden mysteries
belong to those
whose wisdom and truth
shine on in imagination


Written for Ann
~Dawn Drover~

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In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I’ve been turning over in my mind ever since.

Whenever you feel like criticizing any one,” he told me, “just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.”'


F. Scott Fitzgerald. (Lines from The Great Gatsby)
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Franz Kafka

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